Ghosting Story
Amy Alkon is not just the columnist that I have been studying this summer, but she is also a light to many people going through tough times in their lives. Unlike a lot of the other columnists we had the option of reading work from, I chose to read Alkon’s columns because she not only writes about her opinions, but she also directly talks to someone who needs help while also still spinning it in a more broad sense to keep other people from getting hurt or to help them get out of a bad situation that might be similar. The most prominent reason for her being so respected in her field is how she saves her bias until the end of her work, leaving viable room for the readers to absorb the rational thinking and scientific proof in order to develop their own feelings on the topic before being clouded by another person’s views.
In one of her columns I read entitled “Ghosting Story”, Amy Alkon breaks down and rationalizes why people might “ghost” someone else during or before a relationship. She talks about how having the ability to hide behind a screen and completely cut another person out of your life and never have to think of them again with the single click of a button has caused so many people to develop things like trust issues, anxiety and depression at younger and younger ages. As our generation progresses, we can see that the romantic idea of falling in love forever is clouded by the constant fear in the back of your mind that another person could just easily leave you out of the blue, never giving you an explanation and leaving you even more insecure and damaged than you were before. Alkon used these facts to address her fan who was seeking advice who Alkon gave the code name of “disturbed” for the sake of her column. Alkon then ended this column by telling her readers to “expect unreliability” with other people nowadays.
Discussion Question: Do you think our generation’s commitment issues have anything to do with the society we’ve been raised in? If so, what part of our upbringing do you think had the biggest impact on this?
I do think that our current generation with all of the online dating, texting, etc. has effected the people that we are growing up to be. Cell phones are the major cause of this problem in my opinion because of all of the things people can do on them. People who have been in serious long term relationships can now break up with simple “sent” and then move on and never talk to the other person again. This leaves whoever reading the text heartbroken, lost, maybe even depressed but in todays society it’s becoming the new “norm”. So in my eyes all of these commitment issues we face daily are because of our phones.
I do think our generation’s commitment issues have to do with the society we’ve been raised in. I think social media and being able to hide behind a screen is one of the biggest impacts of why this happens to many people.
I do believe that people’s commitment have definitely been hindered by our society due to a lot of new things becoming influences over the way we act and this sudden surge of people on the internet giving their opinions on things that don’t need an opinion like having and maintaining relationships. Although, the one thing that has caused this is the introduction of social media and how over the years it continues and will still continue to have negative influences over us all.
The commitment issues many people in our generation have today one hundred percent stems with the society we’ve been raised in. The biggest thing that causes our commitment issues is social media and the ability of hiding behind a screen to confront someone, break-up with someone, etc. The scariest part about this is that social media and cell phones aren’t going away. I believe that this will be a constant issue as we move forward.
I believe that one of the biggest influences in regard to our generation’s commitment issues stems from the prevalence of technology in our society. For example, we have grown up in an era of rapid technological advancement and instant access to information, communication, and entertainment. This environment of instant gratification could play a factor in patience levels and willingness to invest time and effort into long-term commitments, as we are used to quick results and constant stimulation. Additionally, the prevalence of online communication and social media can impact how we form and maintain relationships. The digital realm offers a degree of anonymity and distance, which might affect our ability to establish deep, meaningful connections and commitment in face-to-face interactions.
I definitely think that our lack of ability to commit to something as a whole has affected the society we were raised in. Now that we no longer have to rely on face to face communication some relationships have become a little less personalized. You can easily say things that you don’t mean as an online persona, and without the emotional attachment you would have with a face to face relationship, it is only that much easier to shut things down before they can even begin. It is so much easier to do this without feeling anything because in reality, just like you never fully put yourself out there to this person they never fully gave themselves to you either.
I do believe that the commitment and communication issues our generation is faced with has a lot to do with the society we’ve been raised in. The biggest impact on this situation is definitely the expanding items in technology. Young adults in present day, who have been raised all round technology, have the ability to talk to their significant other anytime of the day on their phones. This creates a communication barrier that cannot be understood like an in-person conversation could be. In my eyes, the relationships these days are not as genuine as the relationships held by people born before access to technology.
There’s no doubt that our generation’s commitment issues and today’s society are directly connected. The reason for most people’s commitment issues is because of fear. And where do we obtain these fears? Through social media, which is a major part of today’s society. The biggest impact of this issue is obviously social media and the technology that we all have, which is our phones.
In my opinion, I do believe that our generation’s commitment issues definitely have a take on the society we’ve been raised in. The cultivation for this is honestly the technology we have. Since we’ve been born, technology has always been around and as we’ve grown, it has quickly advanced. With access to electronics, people are easily able to use the internet such as social media to interact with others. Although it is a great way to connect with people, it doesn’t compare to real-life interactions. People can effortlessly talk to one another when texting but can also ghost them just as fast. This could lead the “ghost” to continue doing the same thing to other people creating no bond between the person they talk to. They also hurt the person who was abandoned as they will now feel confused about why that happened and lose their loyalty to others because of trust issues. The power that one click of a button can do could seriously ruin a relationship between people which is why technology is the reason many individuals in our generation have commitment issues.
I do believe our generation’s commitment issues are related to the society we have been raised in. When we are young, we learn from the people around us, which is why it is common for people to have similar habits or ideas as their parents. However, in modern times, we now have access to the internet. We are raised in a society where we can be influenced by random stranger over the internet making videos on why they think the earth is flat. I believe the internet is the largest cause of these commitment issues. We are the first generation to have grown up with it, and we are now seeing more and more people develop things like depression and anxiety. The modern internet is still fairly young, and as a result, there has not been enough time to truly learn how it effects people. Commitment issues in future generations may begin to fade away. Parents today didn’t grow up with smartphones and social media. They don’t know how to handle it.